What’s Your Motivation?

I'm here today, ladies, to talk about change. Changing habits. We all have those little idiosyncrasies, those bad habits that we really struggle with. The tiny little thorns that we just can't seem to remove from our daily lives.

For me, it's receipts. Credit card receipts—or actually, the lack thereof. I am terrible about remembering to keep my receipts. To fully understand why this is on my mind enough to merit a blog entry, you have to know my husband. He is the Organization King—and yes, he really does deserve a capitalized title! J If his current business were ever to fail, he could make a killing as an organization consultant. And of course, since organization and efficiency are so important to him, it only makes sens that he married me, because I am… a tornado. Seriously. I have no organizational skills whatsoever. I am my own personal disaster area.

Usually this works out well, as we complement each other. He is fantastic about helping me whenever I need it or ask for it; and I like to think that I helped to prepare him for what life with small children would be like. J

But it does not work well when it comes to receipts. Jon is absolutely militant about making sure that we have every single credit card receipt, and that they are all labeled appropriately for our budgeting system. I just reread that sentence, and I have to admit that I smirked a bit. But honestly, my point is not to poke fun at him, it's just to let you know that it is important to him. And this is nothing new—he has felt this way for the entire time I have known him.

And yet, after 7 ½ years of marriage, I still struggle to give him my receipts. And it frustrates him—and it frustrates me because it frustrates him! It's not that I don't care about his feelings or our budget or anything… I don't know what it is! I just can't get it together when it comes to that area.

So, ummm… I'm talking about receipts a lot more than I really intended to here. My point is, we all have some area in our lives where we just struggle to get it together, to make a change and really commit to it. These are not your typical I-didn't-like-this-so-I-changed-it habits. These are the this-has-been-my-New-Year's-resolution-for-six-years-running habits. The things that just keep coming back. For me it's receipts—I've tried sitting down at the end of every day to get them together, I've tried putting them in a specific place each time so that they're easy to find (because even when he sits down to go over the bill and asks me for them, I consistently come up short by several receipts…), I've tried many things. And they all work for a while. But then the novelty wears off.

For some people, it may be an issue of diet. Or exercise. Or being on time. Or many, many other things. But regardless of the issue, here's my question for you: Have you overcome a habit/issue like this? Or are you overcoming one now? How do you keep yourself motivated in the long run—when the novelty of the newest "fix" wears off and reality sets in?

To me, I think one of the best tools in any change is accountability. When my son was born and I needed to lose weight, I joined Weight Watchers. Just knowing that someone else was going to be weighing me every week really kept me honest—and knowing that I would get little rewards for my milestones along the way helped, too. I am now implementing that with my little receipt habit by asking my husband to help keep me accountable, by the way.

So what do you say? What keeps you going when the going gets tough? I'd love all the help I can get! Believe me, credit card receipts are the only things standing between me and perfection. ;-)

And by the way, the next installment of Katy's Family Forest is coming soon. In fact, that's what I sat down to write this afternoon—but this is what came out instead.

Talk to you all soon.

For such a time as this

Last Christmas we got a wonderful gift that was a life saver on our recent trip: a DVD player for our car. I love it, mainly because it is not installed in our car, so we can get it out for a big road trip, then store it away so we're not fighting over whether or not the kids get to watch movies when we go to Wal-Mart. J

On our recent trip, we had enough movies to last us even if we just lived in the car for the entire vacation. Seriously. I'm not good at making decisions, and you know how life is with kids: if I had brought 5 movies they would have wanted to watch the 6^th one that I decided to leave behind! So I brought just about everything we had (which, to be fair, is not much—we don't watch a lot of TV), and some from the library, and a few from my parents' house. Yes, I know. Out of control.

The other inevitability with small children is that they will pick a favorite movie and not want to watch anything else. Ever. Right now, that is my children with Cedarmont Kids. Honestly, it really doesn't bother me, because they are great DVDs of kids singing wholesome songs. I'll admit, the DVD was probably made in the early 90s and was not exactly a major-studio production. But all in all, I'd rather have my kids watching that than, say, SpongeBob SquarePants (which they are not allowed to watch, by the way).

BUT on the way home, after listening to "I'm in-right, out-right, up-right, down-right happy all the time…" for about the 10,000^th time in 6 hours, not to mention the several days before that, I needed a change. So I announced that it was Mommy's turn to pick a movie! Nevermind that Jon and I couldn't actually see whatever they were watching—the monitors were strapped to our headrests, so we could definitely hear every last bit!

I reached behind the seat and pulled out the stack of DVDs, or at least as much as I could grab in one hand. J I selected a VeggieTales movie and popped it in. It was the story of Esther, one that (to my knowledge) the kids had not seen before. The kids think those movies are great, and Jon and I were chuckling too, as the Jews in this story were not to be destroyed, but banished to the Island of Perpetual Tickling.

And then something unexpected happened. The movie, just for a second, took a more serious turn, and it stuck with me. VeggieTales, of course, usually takes the basic Bible story and then re-writes the script, right? I mean, the Bible is without a doubt the best and most important book ever written, but it is seriously lacking in veggie humor. I don't expect to hear a lot of dialogue taken directly from The Good Book, you know?

But this was. As Mordecai and Esther talk about Haman's plot against their people, Mordecai admonishes Esther that she could have been made queen "for such a time as this." I found myself quoting that phrase along with Pa Grape.

Esther didn't know when she was taken from her home and groomed to be a potential queen that God had a grand plan in store. She didn't seek to become queen because she knew of Haman's hate for the Jews and thought she would stop him from the inside. She didn't know the big picture. But God did.

For such a time as this…

I thought about this phrase again as I was reading about Paul in the book of Acts. He had been arrested on a trip to Jerusalem, then brought before the Sanhedrin, then before the governor, then again two years later (He was still in prison!) before the next governor, none of whom could determine any actual crimes that Paul had committed—yet they kept him a prisoner. Then a king, King Agrippa, comes to the town where Paul is being held, and Festus (the governor) has King Agrippa listen to Paul's story as well. At the end of his testimony, Paul appeals to King Agrippa's knowledge of (and belief in) the Jewish prophets, and the king scoffs that Paul would think he could "convert" him to Christianity in such a short time. And then, "Paul replied, 'Short time or long—I pray God that not only you but all who are listening to me today may become what I am, except for these chains.'" (Acts 26:29)

Paul didn't know when he was imprisoned two (or more) years earlier that King Agrippa was coming to hear him. But he took advantage of the opportunity. Maybe he was imprisoned just for that moment.

It's easy for us, as we read through the stories in the Bible, to see the big pictures in the lives of those in it. We know in our minds that Abraham and Sarah had Isaac late in life, but we don't have to live through the first ninety years with them, when they didn't know that they would ever become parents. We read about Saul's conversion, but don't think about the first many years of his life when he didn't know Christ and had no idea that the Road to Damascus would become so significant for him.

But in our own lives, we can grow impatient. Why am I here? How is God going to use me? When is God going to use me? In fact, this is where I have found myself for the past year or so. You see, back in high school I went to a missionary presentation one Sunday night… If you grew up in a missionary-supporting church, you know what it was like: lots of slides of African natives cooking over open fires, eating creatures that I wouldn't even want to see in real life; talk about life in such a rustic setting (to say the least); and lots of time to think about how that was definitely not the life for me! But at the end, the missionary gave a special address to the youth. When he was finished, he asked that those who felt called into full-time ministry—not necessarily missions, but any full-time service for God—come forward, so that the church could pray for them. I have no idea what he said prior to that or what the prayer was or just about anything else that happened that night. But I knew, without a doubt, that I needed to head up front. God was calling me, nudging me.

That was over 12 years ago, and sometimes it's easy to feel like the time from then until now has been a waste—I'm not, after all, a missionary or a writer or any of the other things I thought I might be now. But God sees the big picture. Maybe I was called then to be used now.

I was reminded by a friend's devotional yesterday that life isn't always about the doors that God opens, but about the hallways in between. The picture is from a fantastic book and that she and I both read (Chasing Daylight, which is definitely on my list of recommended reading). I am finally enjoying the journey—the hallway—without impatiently yanking and banging on every closed door, and serving God where I am, resting in the knowledge that He knows where the hall leads.

And you know what? I'm about to turn a corner. I don't know what I'll find. I don't know if I am sneaking up on Something or if Something is sneaking up on me. J But I feel it. That nudging. That call. It's back, and I am excited. Maybe it'll be tomorrow, and maybe it'll be another twelve years, but God is leading me… Someday maybe I'll be able to say, "God was preparing me for such a time as this."

But in the meantime, I want to enjoy the journey.

Thanks for coming along for the ride. I'll keep you posted. ;-)

Vacation Roundup--Updated with photos!

Thanks to all of you who have e-mailed asking about our trip! Wow! You guys are really great! So… not that I expect you all to want to hear every detail of our little family life, but I thought I would give you a little summary of our trip.

Well, our vacation actually started the day before we left, if that makes any sense. Last Friday night, we were able to go to a circus here in our hometown, and it was great!!! If you have a chance to see Carson & Barnes, I highly recommend it. I had never been to a tent circus before, and it was such a fun atmosphere! The kids really enjoyed it—especially the part where they got to eat a snow-cone—and Jon and I had a great time too. There were some really cool things there (like some cool acrobats and even elephant rides!) and some really bizarre things (like a contortionist—UGH!), and overall it was just a great way to start our week of family time.

The next morning we left our house bright-and-early-ish J and headed to my parents' house to start our big adventure. This was the first time Jon and I have had a chance to go on a trip with my parents, and it was so great! Not only did we enjoy getting to spend the time with them, but it was really neat for me that the kids got to see them every day for a week. Even this morning (two days after we got back) Matt woke up saying, "Papa? Papa? Papa!"

Anyway, our main destination for the trip was Colonial Williamsburg. However, we rented a house out there, and the house was only available for four nights. So first we went to DC, which is basically right on the way for us. Can I just tell you, Priceline is a wonderful thing??? We were able to get a 4-star hotel in downtown DC for just $75 a night! Yay!!!

We had a great time in our nation's capitol, even though we weren't there for very long. We only hit a couple of "attractions" but they were all so worthwhile. We did get to see one of my very favorite things there, which is the WWII memorial. It was just as beautiful as I remembered it, and the four of us (Jon, the kids, and I) enjoyed sitting on the edge of the fountain with our feet dangling in the water. We also checked out the Native American Museum and some absolutely beautiful gardens by the Smithsonian Castle. Oh, and we found a fabulous place to eat near Chinatown. If you are ever in that area, head straight for Clyde's! It is AWESOME—a very nice place to go on a romantic date or for a more formal dinner, but also very kid-friendly.

On Monday we headed to Williamsburg and our house with the indoor heated swimming pool… or so we thought. We got to the house and headed straight for the pool. "Oh," we thought, "we must need to turn the heat up." But alas, it was no use. The boiler was broken. And unfortunately, it remained that way for the duration of our trip. Those of you who know us "in real life" may start to think that we have some sort of "heated pool curse" after the OBX fiasco last year… I'm starting to wonder about it myself. J So anyway, that was a REAL bummer, because I don't think the air temperature dipped below 90 degrees the entire time we were there! It was unbelievably hot and humid… OY! Jon and I ventured into the pool a couple of times, and the kids loved to play AROUND it—you know, by tossing in balls and such that they expected us to fetch for them. J But that was about the extent of our luxurious pool time. Oh well.

But the "historic triangle", as they call it, was very, very cool. And you are talking to a girl who is NOT into history. At all. We didn't get to see much of Williamsburg, to be honest, but I enjoyed what we saw, and I loved Jamestown and Yorktown. The museum at Yorktown is one of the best I have ever seen, and we loved getting to see the artillery demonstration and learning about the medical practices of the day and… so many things. And I feel like there's still so much more to see! I can't wait to go back—but maybe in spring or fall, when it's a little cooler. J

Some of my favorite memories of the week, though, are just of the time together. Watching Matt explore and play in a shady spot in Williamsburg, while everyone else was on a tour of the governor's palace. (He absolutely did NOT want to sit for that!) Seeing Grace just cling to her daddy, so happy to have him all to herself for a week. Making smores in the fire pit in the backyard. Playing cards with my parents after bedtime, which we haven't really had a chance to do since we had kids. And even just having time to myself—the few days that we did get in a nap time, I was typically the only one who didn't nap, and it was wonderful! I read, I prayed, I even exercised.

And now we're home, which has also been good. We had to check out of the house on Friday morning, and Jon and I drove straight home, pulling in around 10 PM Friday night. It made for a long day of driving, but it has been so nice to have the entire weekend at home before getting back to reality on Monday morning. We all overslept this morning, so we didn't make it to church, but we are enjoying time with the kids and getting the house back in order.

Here are a few highlights of the trip. Enjoy! (The pictures are a little small for my taste, but I'm not sure how to do it any better... But if you click on the slideshow below, it'll bring it up the picture you clicked on a separate window that is bigger. Then you can click on "View Album" and see all the pic or a bigger slideshow from there.)

I'll get back to my regular posting soon! :-)

Some questions I am pondering...

Vacation is almost over! I am sitting on the couch of our rented house in Virginia while my parents are reading and my wonderful husband is putting sweet Gracie to bed. (Matt has been down for a few hours already.) We leave tomorrow, and as I reflect on the past week I have come up with a few questions...

• Why is 75 such a perfect temperature for air, but not for a swimming pool?
• Why do children who normally go to bed at 8:00 and get up at 7:00 STILL manage to get up at 7:00, even when they've gone to bed 2 hours (or more!) late?
• How did colonists survive these temperatures without AC?
• Oh, and how did they survive without--gulp--wireless internet?????
• How many times can one person listen to "Cedarmont Kids" sing "Behold, behold, I stand at the door and knock, knock, knock" in one sitting?
• When is our next trip???

It's been a nutty week, and not everything has gone according to plan... but it has been a great time of togetherness both for the four of us, and for us with my parents. We have seen some neat things and shared some good times, and I love each member of my family even more than I did when we got here.

I look forward to talking to you more about the trip! :-)

It's time!!!

Have you ever been so busy doing mommy things that you don't have time to be a mommy? That's how I've felt all this week... I've been doing laundry and dishes, cooking and cleaning; working hard on this moms' conference; getting some planning and prep done for MOPS next year; and the list goes on. I have countless times heard, "Mommy, will you play with me?" And just as often I've replied, "Honey, Mommy really has to do some work right now. I'll play with you as soon as I can." Ugh.

But now, it's time to just be the mommy. For the next week we will watch movies and play tag and color and talk and play "Larry Boy" (which, as Gracie describes it, is a game where "we just run around and don't catch anybody"). :-) It's time to love on my children and my husband and think and enjoy. Aaaaaahhhhhhhh. I'm breathing more deeply just thinking about it.

Well, I hope to check in with you all this week, but no guarantees. If not, I'll talk to you when we get back.

Have a blessed week.